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Advent Guide for Families

Advent is a special time for us to slow down and prepare our hearts to receive Christ. For Orthodox Christians, Advent begins November 15th. In this guide, I want to share the various resources available to help your family mark this season in your homes. Each family will take on their own unique traditions. The key is to do ONE thing, and build from there!

(1) Advent Wreath

One of my favorite Advent traditions is creating an Advent wreath. History of Advent wreaths : Advent wreaths first originated in Germany in 1830 and the story goes that Johann Hinrich Wichern (1808-81), a pastor in Germany, built a wreath out of an old cartwheel to help the children in his mission school count the days until Christmas. He added small candles to be lit every weekday and Saturday during Advent, and on Sundays, a large white candle was lit. Although it wasn’t widely popular until the 19th century, German immigrants then brought the tradition with them to America in the 20th century.

An Advent wreath is a wonderful tradition to bring to your home! Although it’s origins did not stem from Orthodox countries, we certainly sanctify everything we do! I like to call it the American contribution to Orthodoxy. A lit candle is a symbol of expectation and hope, especially poignant in the darkness of winter. The candles of the advent wreath can light our homes and warm our hearts as we look forward to the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

If you’re unfamiliar with how to use an Advent Wreath, it is a circle of candles that are lit one at a time, increasing by one each week of Advent. There is a candle in the center that is lit on Christmas. The advent wreath is often surrounded by greenery. Every part of the advent wreath contains symbolism that points us back to Christ.

Here is how you set up an Advent Wreath:

  • Find a prominent place in our home that your family can easily see and gather near. This can be your kitchen table, home altar, or some other prominent place.

  • Setting up an Advent Wreath - when I first wrote this blogpost, there were no Orthodox Advent wreaths on the market. This year, much to my excitement, there are several options available. The basics of what you will need are 7 candles with holders (some holders have 8 candles to account for the times where there is an extra Sunday during Advent):

How to use an Advent Wreath:

  • Light one candle for each Sunday throughout Advent - On the first day of advent (November 15th), light the first candle. From then on, light one additional candle each Sunday, increasing by one each week. Some advents seasons contain only six Sundays, and some only five. If the 7th candle in the circle isn’t needed for a Sunday before Christmas, you can light that one on Christmas Eve. By Christmas Eve, every candle in the circle should be lit, and on the feast of the Nativity of our Lord, you light all of the candles, including the one in the center!

  • You should use an advent wreath in the way that best suits your family. Some people light the candle(s) every day during evening prayers, or light them and sing a hymn. Others prefer to just light them on Sundays and share the daily Bible readings together. You can also pair the readings from the Jesse Tree, or practice singing the hymn of the Nativity. There is no “right way” to use an Advent Wreath - just find the routine that benefits and blesses your family!

  • Watch this 1 minute tutorial on Instagram on how we used an Advent Wreath last year

(2) Advent Readings, Study and the Jesse Tree

The Antiochian Archdiocese publishes daily readings for each of the 40 days of the fast and the 12 days of Christmas. These are daily scripture readings that take us from Genesis all the way to the birth of Christ, showing us through the scriptures that all things point to Christ! In addition to the readings, some families create a tree with ornaments to use along side the readings. Here are some readings available:

(3) Advent Calendar

The marking of time has always been an important part of human existence. For children, this is especially important to help them “mark the time” as we journey through advent. Typical Western advent calendars have 25 days. Because the advent season is longer in Orthodoxy (beginning Nov 15th), you will need a 40 day advent calendar. There are a number of 40 day Advent calendars available now, which has been wonderful to see, or you can choose to create your own! This can be a wonderful way to countdown the days until Nativity with your children.

(4) Celebrate the Various Feast Days During the Fast

Celebrating the various feasts during the fast is a wonderful way to create traditions that your family will look forward to year after year! This is also a way to bring the life of the church in our homes. For my family, some of our most dear and favorite traditions happen during Advent:

  • St Martin of Tours (Nov 12th) - see my Martinmas Blogpost for how to celebrate this feast

  • Entrance of the Theotokos (Nov 21st) - check out Parousia Press on how to celebrate this feast

  • St Nicholas Day (Dec 6th) - see my St Nicholas Guide for how to celebrate this feast

  • St Lucia Day (Dec 13th) - see my St Lucia Guide for how to celebrate this feast

  • St Herman of Alaska (Dec 13th) - check out these Spruce Island Cookies for his feast

  • Nativity of Our Lord (Dec 25th) - check out Parousia Press on how to celebrate the Nativity and the 12 Days of Christmas

(5) Participating in the Fast

Important elements to any fasting period in the Orthodox Church is (1) Prayer, (2) Fasting, and (3) Almsgiving. Find ways for your family to participate in these three things in order to make this season fruitful and as a means for our salvation. Some ways to do this as a family: Attend services, pray together daily and read the scriptures, collect food for a homeless shelter, donate warm coats or blankets to those in need, and connect with your local parish for other opportunities to serve the needy around you.

Make a Plan

This time of year is very busy with all of the cultural things going on that it is easy to get burnt out. Or perhaps you’re like me and start off strong, but 2 weeks in you burn out, having taken on too much. It’s important for us to prepare ahead of time to help ensure we reach out family goals for how we want to spend this advent season. I found this podcast “Preparing for Advent” by Hannah Vasquez of All These Things Podcast very practical and insightful.

Another fantastic resource for making a plan is the Holly & Ivy Orthodox Advent Planners which are available for digital download or bound through Parousia Press.

Fasting

An essential part of every fasting period is the actual fast! As Orthodox Christians, we fast for more than half the year, giving up meat, dairy, eggs, and on strict fast days, giving up oil, wine and fish . By following the prescribed fast of the Church, we are working on our self control, and our hope is by abstaining from foods, we learn to also abstain from sinning. Of course, fasting is a spiritual discipline that should be practiced with the oversight and direction of your spiritual father and priest. You should consult your spiritual father if you have any specific questions about the fasting discipline as it applies to you, and your children. You can read more about the fasting here.

Nativity Fast Meal Plan

With the help of my friend, Sarah of Orthodox Home, we now officially have the first Orthodox Nativity Fast Meal Plan complete with meal plan, recipes, and grocery list all in one! As someone who struggles every fasting season with planning fatigue and overwhelm of “What am I going to cook for my family,” this meal plan is a God-send! These are tried-and-true recipes the whole family will love! Take the stress out of planning and focus more on preparing nourishing meals for your family. As someone who has attempted to make a lot of fasting meals over the years, I am easily discouraged by how complicated the recipes are, and often struggle to find the rather obscure ingredients list. These meals are whole foods focused and the ingredients aren’t weird so you’re won’t have to shop at a specialty store. Win! Some of the recipes repeat (intentionally) so you’ll use up the same pantry ingredients ultimately saving you time, and money! Simple, frugal, and easy! How does that sound?

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Parousia Press has a wonderful collection of resources for fasting which you can find here

As with all fasting, please remember that abstaining from food during this period of preparation does us no good if we do not also, as St. John Chrysostom teaches us, fast with:

… the eye and the ear and the feet and the hands and all the members of our bodies.

Let the hands fast, by being free of avarice.
Let the feet fast, by ceasing to run after sin.

Let the eyes fast, by disciplining them not to glare at that which is sinful.
Let the ear fast, by not listening to evil talk and gossip.
Let the mouth fast from foul words and unjust criticism.

For what good is it if we abstain from birds and fishes, but bite and devour our brothers?

-St John Chrysostom

Additional Resources for Kids

Activities : For kids activities, I cannot recommend Orthodox Pebbles enough! They have wonderful teaching resources that are easy to do with your kids and have lesson plans attached. On their website there are many free resources. They also have products available for purchase through Draw Near Designs:

Music : for families with kids, we love Gigi Baba Shadid! She is an Orthodox Priest wife and she creates very catchy music for kids to help them learn about our faith. Her CD “Celebrate the Feasts” would be a good one to start with this season since it has a number of songs about Nativity. You can also find her songs on Youtube and Spotify.

Final Thoughts

Lastly, as a reminder, none of these items I mentioned above are necessary. We have collected items over the years and each year we add one new thing to our collection. Also, we choose one or two advent traditions to focus on each year. I don’t usually do them all! My hope is to provide you with many ideas and ways to participate in the Nativity fast, finding what works best for your family. However, keeping our focus on (1) prayer, (2) fasting, (3) almsgiving, and (4) attending Divine Services is the best place to start!

Be sure to follow along with me on Instagram for more Feast Day resources and Nativity activities! I pray you have a joyous and peaceful Nativity Fast!

Kh Destinie